Society news: Hearty congratulations to Benjamin Mako Hill and his beautiful bride Mika Matsuzaki, who tied the knot last weekend. Rumor has it that Mako and Mika’s wedding cake was mocha. And now, your letters.
Dear Adelie, we all know what Tux looks like — how about you? Can we see a photo of you? And don’t be shy, I’m sure you look great. 🙂
— Anonymous
You don’t sign your letter, but I can’t help thinking you’re male. What is it about men and looks? Doesn’t the content of a person’s heart matter more than the turn of her tailfeather?
Let me put it this way — I’m no elephant seal, but they haven’t asked me to pose for a layout in Playbird either.
I’m relatively new at this celebrity thing. I suppose I’m going to have to ask Larry Ewing to do a portrait. For now, just picture Rebecca Romijn as Mystique in X-Men, only in black and white feathers.
Dear Adelie,
Do you and Tux ever make public appearances?
— Potential Groupie
I can’t speak for all species, but if you’ve gone to any Linux conferences, you’ve probably seen Tux there. Here’s a little secret: It’s not the real Tux. They actually rent Tux costumes, and just anyone might be inside one! Next thing you know, they’ll do the same with Santa suits in department stores at Christmas time. It’s enough to destroy your faith in all that’s pure and true.
I personally do not make public appearances, except every now and then to pick up some spicy Thai herring.
Dear Adelie,
How do you pronounce your name? Is it Ay-DELL-ee, AD-ell-ee, Ad-ELL or something else?
— Noah Webster
Most people pronounce it like the place you go to for a corned beef sandwich — aDELLee. I also answer to people who put the emphasis on the first syllable, who perhaps mistake me for Miss Adelaide from “Guys and Dolls.” I can understand their confusion — we are alike in many ways.
Dear Adelie,
I have a list of records in the format “lastname, firstname initial.” I need to turn them into “firstname initial lastname.” Any advice?
— Marketing Drone
While I normally don’t believe in helping anyone with “marketing” in their title, my heart is touched that you’ve come to me. Try this command in Vim: :%s/([^,]*), (.*)/2 1/
Ask Adelie your question. Adelie thanks you all for writing, but regrets that she cannot provide personal answers to all questions.
Category:
- Humor
